The Knicks are back to .500. Can they get over that mark for the first time since Jan. 8, at 5-4? The Pistons and recently-traded Dennis Smith Jr. stand in the way.

Don’t piss your Timbs, the Knicks are back at it tonight in Detroit. With a rickety win in tow, they packed their bags and sped out to the Motor City. Much will be made of the trade these two consummated. New York and Detroit recently swapped guards, Derrick Rose for Dennis Smith Jr., and both are getting a chance to start because of injuries to teammates.

The Pistons (9-24) are second to last in the league coming into tonight’s matchup, but they’ve been playing some frisky ball of late and are very nearly playing .500 ball over their last ten games. The Knicks officially got up to .500 on the year with their win over the Pacers. Both teams are on two-game streaks but in opposite directions. Can the Knicks make it three, or will it be back to square one?

Something tells me Dennis is gonna throw his entire life force into this one. I vote that the Knicks put Frank Ntilikina on him and watch his stinking behind fold under the pressure. Frank has played well, as has Rose. With Immanuel Quickley firmly entrenched as someone that’s at least deserving of minutes and touches unabated, perhaps this guard rotation could really be something. When the Knicks need defense and free throw shooting to shut the door late in a game, Frank is clearly trustworthy.

And now I want you to relax your mind, feel the entire length of your body stretching and reaching into an infinite sea. Feel the very tips of your fingers extending out and beyond the galactic firmament. And now I will play a golden tone for you. Bong!

If I’m reading that right, Elfrid Payton is in injury jail. Bong!

Now imagine you’re Leon Rose. Feel the beige beigeness of the cool and bright office. Looking down at the desk, everything in perfect harmony. The stacked papers, the pleasing, rock-gray telephone, the smooth mahogany desk transforms into your harmonious light. Bong!

Now I want you to pick up the phone and feel it contour to your hand perfectly, firmly, elegantly. Bong!

Now I want you to trade Elfrid Payton. Bong bong!